Cooking for one - there's more to life than take out chicken

I'm in a long distance relationship and it's likely to stay long distance for several more months. Cooking is a passion and I bet I'm not alone in having difficulty cooking for one. It's so easy for me to cook for two or even 20 - it's an act of love; it's a chance to connect; it's energizing and exhilarating to share kitchen space and chop with partner. I love the whole prelude to a meal cooked with someone I love - the menu discussion, the shopping, the opening a bottle of wine as we stake out counter space, the sharing of the really good knife- it's all foreplay. Translating that love and enjoyment to cooking for myself is a lost cause. I've grappled with this issue for five years now. For me, cooking is inherently a social act and it's subtleties are lost when I go solo in the kitchen.

For a while, a few years ago, I simply forgot to cook. I'd realize I was hungry, stare into the fridge and more often than not grab a hunk of cheese, tear off an even bigger hunk of bread and eat standing in the kitchen. I shopped as though I was still shopping for two or more; I threw out obscene amounts of food. I only got back my kitchen groove if the family or friends were coming over for dinner. I gave that self who was pining, yearning to cook with someone, a severe dressing down two years or more ago and made a promise that I would cook for myself. I began the conscious act of making lists and shopping with dishes in mind and I'm pretty good at it now. It helps that the fellow calls or emails to ask 'what are you having for dinner' and we talk food, encouraging one another to try something new or share recipes for old favorites.

It's all well and good to have that motivation but there are still days when I just don't feel like cooking for myself. I've taken to dealing with that situation by browsing the ready-cooked aisle of my favorite supermarket and bringing home something already cooked or oven ready and throw together a balanced meal by adding vegetables or a salad. This afternoon my choices were close to overwhelming - there was ready-cooked wild salmon with a fusion inspired sauce; chicken breasts stuffed with spinach and mushrooms ready to slice thinly; shrimp and crab stuffed mushrooms that required a quick warm through in the oven; dressed crab; ceviche; marinated jumbo shrimp; bbq pork, beef and chicken - and that's just the protein aisle. I could choose from three different pasta salads; couscous; pilaf; twice baked potatoes; rice salad or a sublime looking scalloped potato. Moving on it was up to me whether I built my own salad or selected one pre-assembled. Oh, and the appetizers or 'nibblies' as they are called in my family were equally tempting - great displays of oil-bathed olives; marinated artichoke hearts.

I moved on to the counters where the choice required some work on my part - something to create the illusion of cooking! I finally chose a coconut crusted mahi mahi fillet oven- ready. I could have chosen already seasoned salmon, halibut or cod from the fish case or chicken cordon bleu, stuffed pork chops, chicken, beef or pork kebabs.

I guess my point is that take-out is not a sin! Oh, it used to be that no self-respecting cook would take any short cuts. (I once watched a friend take frozen scalloped potatoes from the container, arrange them in a baking dish and present them as home made. Now I have no shame in picking up a ready made appetizer from the deli and taking it to a friend's house). Julia Child inspired us to be wonder women in the kitchen and that's great - but in moderation. Current life-styles are often not conducive to de-boning the duck after first pressing it. I've finally given myself permission to not only eat well but to do so by raiding the 'take-out' aisles guilt free . Try it. Set the table for one but use the good china, pour a glass of wine into the best crystal, turn up the music that puts you in the mood to like yourself, and in my case, tell the dog that dinner is ready. He'll come, sit by my feet and think my conversation both witty and urbane! Between that and loving left-overs he's a great dinner companion.


If you are enjoying following this blog and our primary website, http://www.connectionsforwomen.com, please help us continue by supporting our affiliates and advertisers. Click through the ads to see what they have to offer.